15 Life Lessons I’ve Learned From My Pet Snail

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This is my snail.

This is my snail.

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Sarah Kobos / BuzzFeed

I’ve had him for about three months, and in that time I’ve become something of a crazy snail lady. People seem to like hearing about and looking at pictures of him much more than they like hearing about or looking at pictures of me. I can’t blame them — LOOK AT HIM.

I’ve learned a lot since he slithered into my life. For example…

1. Do what you love, no matter how small you are.

Alanna Okun / BuzzFeed

Whether that’s knitting, writing, or pooping long thin lines of green.

2. It’s important to feel like your house is a home.

Alanna Okun / BuzzFeed

That’s why his is outfitted with water, chalk (for calcium / shell health), a supply of food many times the size of his own body, and a teeny plastic bench he ignores completely. I think he likes knowing that it’s there, though.

3. It’s worth it to spend money on things you care about.

Like the Really Good Kale.

4. It’s okay to kick back and relax with a few drinks.

Alanna Okun / BuzzFeed

Just don’t go too fast!!

5. There are so many wonderful parts of the internet / world you probably don’t know about yet.

Like my current favorite website, petsnails.proboards.com. I found it when I was trying to figure out whether it was okay to feed my snail potatoes (it is) and promptly fell down the rabbit hole. Everyone who posts is so courteous and earnest, and they genuinely care about the wellbeing of their slimy pals. The memorial section, where snail owners post pictures and memories of the dearly departed, is a reminder that you can feel love for even the smallest, slowest creature.

8. Venture outside your comfort zone.

runaway snail!!!

— Alanna Okun (@alanna)

But it’s okay to do it slowly.

9. Make time to travel.

Alanna Okun / BuzzFeed

We took Amtrak home to Boston for Christmas. We love how spacious and clean their cars are! He’s also been to semi-rural Rhode Island and of course his homeland, Germany.

10. And to unwind.

Alanna Okun / BuzzFeed

With “Vanderpump Rules,” natch.

11. Adele karaoke will cure whatever ails you.

lotta feelings today

— Alanna Okun (@alanna)

12. Don’t forget the little people even when you’re famous.

Alanna Okun / BuzzFeed

Especially when you’re already little.

14. It’s always good to have a friend.

Alanna Okun / BuzzFeed

I’m thinking of getting him one of his own in the near future. Or maybe you have a snail that wants to have a playdate! Hmu.

15. HYDRATE.

Alanna Okun / BuzzFeed

“Nobody likes a shriveled gastropod.” – my snail, probably.

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